I wrote this back in 2009 when living in Rustenburg, and I had two cats with diametrically opposed personalities. They gave me great pleasure, and I learnt a lot from these precious creatures:

I have two cats, one big, black and male (Salem); and the other small, female and white (Whisper). As contrasting as are their appearances, so have they very different personalities.

Salem is almost aloof, unfriendly, coming and going as he pleases. When he wants attention he will boldly come and demand it, climbing onto my chest and literally getting into my face. Whisper, on the other hand, is always around me. She follows me around the garden, sits on the couch next to me, sleeps next to me and wants to be touched.

I see a simple lesson in this. Which do I love more? Well, neither! I love each equally and they receive the same care, and as they ask, I lavish attention on them. It’s what they want and I will not, actually cannot because they are cats, impose myself upon them. It doesn’t quite work that way. If you know cats you will understand.

Then I notice something else: does Salem resent the attention Whisper gets? Of course not! He couldn’t give a damn. He gets what he asks for and what he wants and so does she. He knows he does. All he has to do is ask for more and it will be given him.

So it is with us and the people in our lives and with the world in general. Mostly we get what we demand from our friends, partners or parents. If we ask a lot we get a lot. If we ask little we get little. The big difference between us and my cats is we tend to allow some resentment to grow in us for those who get more. If my sister, for example, gets more attention from my dad, I will be jealous and develop issues with both him and her. If my brother receives more perceivable blessings I begin to doubt my worth and validity, and resent my brother for being a “favourite”. But very much like me with my cats, every single person is equally valid and has equal worth in the universe.

Weird isn’t it? That we tend to neither treat ourselves, or others, in that way?

Perhaps that’s why I love my cats... their simple “issue-lessness” and contentment with their lives. I have often said that if I were to come back in some crazy, "twist of fate" reincarnation, I would want to be Salem. Albeit without the little op...

28 May 2021